Trauma

What Is Trauma?

The word trauma can evoke a sense of something dramatic having happened in your life, like a car accident or a single catastrophic event, but it is often a lot broader than people think. It can also be subtler, harder to define, or insidious.

For folks who feel intensely and deeply, as many people who identify as empaths do, trauma can present itself sometimes in unexpected ways. You might even be experiencing it vicariously, possibly through the trauma stories’ of others. It doesn’t always have to be something that happened to you for it to impact you. Another common experience of trauma is that you should somehow be able to get past it on your own. Many people I see with trauma feel this, which can often be a symptom of the experience. On the one hand knowing that the pain is real, and on the other questioning your experience of reality.

If you grew up in a home where your emotions were invalidated, you had narcissistic parents, or you experienced abuse in childhood, it may be hard to define the trauma. It may have been normalized or it may be hard to remember specific traumatic incidents. It is not uncommon for clients to doubt whether what they experienced was ‘bad enough’ or feel that everything was their fault. Again, I view this as a symptom of the trauma itself - minimizing the impact of trauma, shame and self-blame are often part of the living legacy of trauma. That is, how it continues to impact the person long after the experience is over.

What Does Trauma Feel Like?

Unresolved trauma can trigger you into fight, flight, freeze or shutdown mode without warning. Oftentimes, there’s a sense of being stuck and not being able to move forward in life. At other times, it may be unclear what the issue is, which adds a layer of confusion to the problem. Trauma tends to hijack the nervous system, leading to dysregulation not only in the mind, but also in the body. This may feel like your body is ‘hypervigilant,’ often scanning the environment for danger, or that you are on edge. It could also feel dissociative and numb. In either case there’s a sense of disconnection, overwhelm and difficulty being in the present.

Our society is also rarely a place where a person has space to express who they are in their wholeness. In a fast-paced world, where we present ourselves in different roles to different people, and there is so much emphasis on the individual, there is less opportunity to heal, even though so many of us carry trauma -  it is a collective experience. 

How Can Trauma Therapy Help?

Although sometimes it may feel like you’re relatively powerless to change, this is not the case. I believe you are so much more than what you’ve been subject to - so much more than your trauma. As much as I’m interested in your trauma and helping you process it, I’m just as curious about who you are outside of it, and beyond it. I invite possibilities for a new story of you that also includes all the values and skills that are important to you. 

In trauma counselling, I work with people to help create a sense of safety in their body, as trauma often makes people feel that their body is not a safe place to be. I draw upon my two year training in somaotic-attachment therapy to create a gentle relational approach, work somatically to process trauma in your body and nervous system,  and meet you where you’re at. I also work with metaphor, your imagination, intuition and dreams to help you process and move past the sense of stuckness or paralysis trauma can often lead to. I have found this approach to trauma therapy more effective with empaths or sensitive folks. By connecting to your own resources and intuition, we work to align your body’s story with your own hopes, dreams and preferred identities.

I am also currently enrolled in parts work training for complex trauma offered by Janina Fisher, an internationally recognized trauma expert, called Trauma Informed Stabilization Treatment. Parts work can be particularly useful for folks who have experienced trauma in childhood. Triggers from childhood trauma can evoke strong emotions, body reactions and belief patterns, but by learning to relate to these reactions as parts of you, you not only become more aware, but you may actually relate to yourself differently. I also provide psychoeducation about trauma in a way that is de-shaming and empowering. Some of the benefits folks with complex trauma may notice is more self-compassion, a better ability to manage their triggers, and a stronger sense of self.

If you want to find out more about how I support people with trauma, reach out at: kirsten@kirstennoack.com or you can book a consultation directly here.